Bring Back Jerome to Lost!

Harriet is Harrying

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 18:39:04 -0400

OK. So. I’m in that dark place where many actors live most of their lives. I want to be grateful to have the work, but I just don’t know if I can work with this director. Ok, so like, yesterday I came to work (first day of rehearsal) all prepared to nail the character. I had been working day and night since the last time I posted. GET THIS - he tells me to drop the accent. DROP THE ACCENT? The accent is the character. I don’t know how you can wrap your mind around a dude from the Bay Area that doesn’t have at least a little bit of a discernible accent. We’re not talking Borat here, but let’s be true to life. That’s why I got into acting. To nail accents. And girls. Hahahahaaaa oh man. That was bad. Can you tell I’m a bit giddy? Stressed out about this work I got ahead of me. Haven’t really been sleeping. God bless coffee and those “5 hour energy” shots I should probably not have so many of.

Wired,

Artist’s rendition by my buddy Alexander Nicholas Gabucci....

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 16:48:00 -0400

Artist’s rendition by my buddy Alexander Nicholas Gabucci. …It could happen.

Let me tell you about a little man named Harriet

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 16:41:48 -0400

He’s a hero. He’s a friend. He’s a man among men. He’s insecure, he’s courageous, he’s just like you and me. He’s an insurance salesmen who moonlights as a superhero. AND I SHALL BE PLAYING HIM IN THE PROUDEST PERFORMANCE OF MY LIFE TO DATE. At least I hope it shall be. I am already working on developing the character, even though I have at least three weeks before we start to shoot. Harriet the insurance superhero, from the bay area. I’ve been testing on the baristas.

The story is set in San Francisco, but Harriet is from Montana (I came up with that) so I’m really trying to find the right voice for him - a nice balance between western southern midwestern hick city slicker plantation droll. It’s all of those I think. The final product really is close to my own voice, but that’s good because you don’t want to overplay these things. For example, when I say “bike,” it’s like: “baaaiiieek” if you draw it out. Leonard would say it more like “baaaaiiiek.” Hear the reduced eee there? Yeah you don’t pay the big acting training bucks for nothing.

So yeah been doing my vocal exercises and character exercises here in the coffee hangout I like to call un-corporate Starbucks. I call them that cause they’re really nice. Really just no corporate feeling about this particular Starbucks location, some kind of ambience or something. Plus one of my favorite baristas told me she gets benefits and everything. To be honest, the idea of applying is starting to sound really appealing.

I mean, it would sound more appealing if I didn’t have a really strong feeling about the this role. The director has worked on upwards of three independent short films already, and he’s bringing in a professional special effects makeup artist to help with the CGI and stuff. SO yeah. It just sounds SUPER profesh. We’re talking SUPERHERO profesh. Get it - superhero movie, superhero profesh??? Nevermind. Anyway, yeah I’m just really excited. Throwing a little shindig tonight to celebrate my success. Feel free to hit me up if you wanna stop by. bringbackjerometolost@gmail.com. I got a iphone so I’ll get it anytime, anywhere. Thank you, Steve Job ;)

GOD BLESS YOU HARRIET!

Shoving it down your throats til you cry uncle,

AAAHAHAHHAAAA!

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 18:42:48 -0400

I got caaaaasst! AHAHAHAHAAA!! More to come later my dear friends and followers…

BJ love

4 8 15 16 23 42

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 17:37:57 -0400

You may be saying, “who? wha? Sonuva…” but no. I don’t know any more than you do what these numbers mean. They magically and mysteriously appeared in my inbox recently, as the subject heading of an email. The body simply read: “Best, Walt.” Weirdly enough, the email was from some guy named Joel. Maybe spam. Whatever. I have decided that like all mysterious opportunities the universe presents, it is a window to the future. A window to opportunity. A window to a door to something else. So I have decided to perform what is perhaps the world’s first live blog number meditation. Enjoy.

4 score and seventy years ago. So. Sew. A needle pulling thread. Lead. Like in a pencil, not that rhymes with seed. Need. Feed. Feed the need. Read.

8 great Crazy Eights. Poker. Texas Hold Em. Mold Em. Scold em. Fold em. Laundry. Clothes line. Joe’s fine. Oh, Joe? He’s fine. Good old Joe. Joe Schmo. Whoa. Wha. Ha. Ma. Mama. Mamama.

15 The age at which I got my braces taken off. Not the age that I would have my first kiss. Came much later. Came much greater. Made much better. Butter. Can’t believe it’s not butter. But, her? No, him. Buthim. Buttim. A fat-free butter replacement.

16 Candles. Bandles. Bandy about town. Mouse. House.

23 Twenty three. Funny me. Willy nee. Will he be. Will he be? Willy nilly me. Sheesh. Weesh.

42 My dad’s age. He wears wifebeaters. Not really. But he should. Cause he’s topless sometimes and that’s disturbing. White curly chest hair and old man nipple burns my eyes. Flies. Like him. Bike for him.

love,

p.s. On my way to the lotto - hit me up gmail style and I’ll re back via ip (that’s lingo for iphone).

drat this internet connection

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 15:00:29 -0400

A juicy post 90% completed just lost its way to you thanks to a really really stupid internet connection problem. Thanks for nothing, “hot spot”. Fear not my friends, I’ll do a do-over, just for you.

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 18:21:25 -0400

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Tips for Food Budgeting

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 18:20:00 -0400

I’m half writing these down for my own benefit - ya know just to log my ideas - but I hope they help some poor soul out there too…

*Dumpsters: Be careful here - LA is a good town for dumpster diving but it’s dangerous anywhere. Seek rich chi chi places where you can scavenge on the sly (like in a parking lot) but still find some good stuff. You’ll deal with less hypogenic needles and find more half-used bread loaves and avocados. Stale and brown but sustenance all the same.

*Cafes: You can buy a tea for a buck and get away with sitting for hours. Before the bus boy makes his regular rounds, grab and pocket the half eaten sandwiches and cookies and stuff. Return to your table and munch behind the safety of your “How to Be a Working Actor” paperback.

*People: Catch them after they exit the grocery store. Make up some brilliant story about how you haven’t eaten in so long because your wallet was stolen and you’re waiting for you mom to pick you up and you have low blood sugar and just need an apple or something. That one actually happened to me - my wallet wasn’t stolen but my mom was like twenty minutes late picking me up from Clowning class and I was really hungry. Been using it ever since.

*Restaurants: Just don’t pay. But take it from me, don’t go back afterwards.

Thanks and many apologies to McDonald’s, Le Petit Chathouse, Joe Barbecue, and countless others. Your forgiveness and understanding are greatly appreciated.

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY NIGHT, MY FRIENDS

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 18:22:04 -0400

Our scene opens to a truly rad party at Matthew Fox’s pad (I think you’ll recall that he and I exchanged a few brief words at the kraft service table). I have never in my life seen such a splendiferous feast of cribdom. He had ice sculptures in the shape of pelicans, himself, Evangeline Lilly, John Leguizamo… (Not sure why on the latter.) There were multiple staircases going up and down and around his house - even sideways. He had a saber toothed tiger caged in his back yard. There’s music. There’s dancing. There’s lights flashing lights and papparazzi clawing at the gates to get in. Kanye, Beyonce, Carrot Top - they’re all in attendance, from A list to B list to D list to me…little old BJ.

Well, I am working this place like my life depended on it. Forget “networking” - I’m a god among kings. Jay-Z wants to collaborate on an album, Steven Spielberg wants to produce my life story, Jessica Alba nicknames me “papa” and George Carlin is sitting on my lap, sipping martinis.

WELL. Just when it can’t get any better, up saunters the casting director herself of what special television show on which yours truly was briefly featured and has yet to make a return appearance? You guessed it: LOST. I forget that casting director’s name. Susan? Annie? Apricot? Let’s call her Apricot, since that feels the most right. So Apricot just saunters up to me and tells me how much they all miss me on the show. Matthew Fox hisself really ENJOYED MY PERFORMANCE and felt that I BROUGHT A LOT TO THE ROLE. Well. Enough said. I whip a headshot out of the pocket of my spacesuit (always be prepared) and hand off that bad boy for her usage.

You know how some dreams just feel so real, that when you wake up kind of groggy you believe that they’re true? Well, it’s my humble opinion that these kinds of dreams are a window into your future. If you can dream it hard enough, and want it hard enough, it will come to be, and good dreams like mine are the first sign that it’s happening. Sure, maybe George Carlin won’t sit on my lap sipping martinis, especially considering he’s passed away RIP George Carlin, but I like to believe that this dream is a first step into the bright future that lies ahead.

Thanks all for the support and love. You’re my rock in a jello world.

Love from your favorite BJ

Photo

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 12:57:33 -0400

Carpe Diem

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 12:54:00 -0400

If you’ve ever had a great acting teacher, or worked with like a wise ninja sage or dojo master, you’ve probably been told to believe in yourself, and even to write down the positive things that you believe to yourself. These wise masters call these positive things “affirmations.” They can be things that you’re thankful for, things that inspire you, or things that you know about yourself that are good in some form or other. Today, I’m going to take a great personal risk, an extension of my trust to you, my fans, and share my affirmations for the day with you. They are below. Think of them as a thank you laundry list to the god or goddess or gods or invisible light that may or may not be in all of us. If you want, feel free to do some deep breathing and meditation to help you truly understand their power on an emotional and spiritual level. I know I have.

Here goes:

* Rice Krispies. I am extremely grateful to the universe and all that is for Rice Krispies, and all of the various forms that they take - Rice Krispie Treats, Rice Krispie Squares, Rice Krispies Treats in various shapes and sizes like bats or santa clauses etc. , and Cocoa Rice Krispies.

* My acting. Never have I been so good at anything.

* My parents, for raising me, feeding me, and letting me follow my dreams from the comfort of their lovely home.

* Tim Russert, George Carlin, Anderson Cooper and all of the other brave souls who have come and gone from this world recently. And who have made a positive impact.

* Monkey, the small yellow glass seahorse I call my friend.

* Starbucks Lattes: in Vanilla, Caramel Macchiato, Cinnamon Dolce, Skim, and Hot Chocolate. Let’s be honest, Starbucks is the reason that I keep going. Even when there’s nothing to do and I have time to kill or the opportunity to take a break, that caffeine kicks in and gets me going, keeping me productive even if it’s not directly helpful to me or anyone in particular. And it keeps my stress and sense of urgency high so that I’m always pushing forward.

* To the girl in Starbucks yesterday, who borrowed my napkin and thanked me when I complimented her sweater. I can be reached at bringbackjerometolost@gmail.com.

* All the great people at On the Bubble: Andrea, Luke, Kevin, Clyde, and of course the one and only Gordo - vimeo.com/onthebubble. Don’t forget to re-watch the episode in which I’m featured. I feel pretty good about the work I did on that appearance.

Love to all of your respective mothers,

I have never seen anything more beautiful in my life.

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:03:30 -0400

I have never seen anything more beautiful in my life.

The Magic of Connectivity

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:01:57 -0400

I will swear by coffee, because I think all of my greatest revelations happen when I’m drinking it, or soon after the buzz kicks in. Have you noticed that? I’m not one of those “have an idea in a moment of peace” kind of people - I’m always in the middle of an overwhelming caffeine buzz as an idea jumps out at me and changes my life forever. Or at least for those next several minutes.

So today I’m sipping on my latte, it’s about 10am in the Starbucks - I’m in a crappy spot where the sun is blinding my eyes and making it hard for me to focus, when bizity bam - this question pops into my head: how can I use the internet, and my very incredible devoted fans, as a way to help my career, and even get me back on Lost? I’ll tell you how people: NETWORKING. Let’s be honest, I can’t get into the A-list Hollywood parties, can’t get seen by CAA - at least not today. BUT WITH YOUR HELP I can. I can do anything with a little help from my friends. Here’s what I’m thinking - there are lots of you - and even more out there in the world beyond. Surely one of you is dating or rooming with or hung out with the best friend’s cousin’s sister of someone in Hollywood with access to the window to my dreams.

WON’T YOU HELP ME?

Call around, ask your friends, hit up that uncle who works in post-production that you had a beer with last Christmas. OR, help me with my outreach efforts. Create a facebook cause. Start a myspace page. Digg it. If my friends and your friends reach out to their friends and their friends, we could have millions working on the Jerome project by morning! So whattya say, compadres? Will you join together to give Jerome a new start? A new start as a recurring character on Lost Season 5!!?!?

I mean, let’s be honest - Lost is amazing but all good things can get better. I’m not trying to be a hero, I’m not trying to say I’m better than any of the very fine actors on Lost in past and current seasons, I just want to share my love with something that I love and be loved in return. Just love. I just want lots of love like a love house with love all around it and beautiful with love. And I need your help. Tell your internet friends that you want to spread the love and the universe will return the favor.

Love and blessings,

J lo-ve

As Not So Much Requested

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 14:21:52 -0400

Ok so fair enough there wasn’t a major response or really any at all about the worst role I was offered. But let’s talk about it anyway. Maybe some shy fan of the Jerome meister wants to hear this dark tale, and I need to fulfill that unspoken request.

WORST ROLE EVER: Toilet Embezzlement Guy #4. In a student film entitled the “Whizzard of Oz.” A trip, right? Yeah no literally. Apparently that’s what happens when directors let hallucinogens do their creative thinking. I thought it looked like a really promising project cuz the director offered me cheese crackers and talked to me about the importance of psychofusion funatics…or something…but it turned out to be a bust. I had to sit in a closet wrapped in wet toilet paper for 86 minutes to “get into character,” and then they ended up cutting my part down to like, 3 seconds of on screen time. And I wasn’t even featured, just in the background behind an arguement between Alice in Wonderland and her pet manitee. I would have killed to play that manitee.

The things actors do for their art…*sigh* It’s a rough life, but I wouldn’t have it otherwise. I’d like to send out a special thank you in this entry to my friends and family for your incredible support. And mom - thanks for the care package, I really enjoyed the cookies. See you upstairs at dinner time.

“Some people look at the past and say, ‘why?’” I look at the future
and say, “why not?” -Martin Luther King, Jr. I think. I might be wrong on who said that. I’ll google it and get back to you.

Over and out.

Her hair was different, but you get the idea.

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:02:19 -0400

Her hair was different, but you get the idea.

To Thomas from North Circleton, LA

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:49:33 -0400

I wanted to go ahead and follow up with the other possible topics I offered a few days ago for discussion on my blog. You voted that you wanted to hear about my experience auditioning for Lost - can’t blame you. HOWEVER, one sir Thomas* from North Circleton, LA* sent a very persuasive email requesting, nay BEGGING that I talk about the most famous person that I have ever been on a date with. So here you go Thomas. Her name was/is Halle Berry. Now now, before you go hee hawing about how I was never on a date with Halle (as they call her here in the entertainment business), you’re right. However, I WAS on a date with a very lovely lady named Susan in the VERY SAME RESTAURANT where Halle dined. The plot thickens…

Basically, Susan and I sat down for a nice meal at Wong’s Tasty House**, opened our menus and began to peruse the appetizers. I wasn’t thirty seconds into the Warm Duck Salad and Spiced Curry Bites before I noticed a strikingly beautiful woman sitting at the bar with a man friend. It was definitely Halle. I had just watched Monster’s Ball a week earlier (talk about serendipity) so her face was fresh in my mind.

It was hard to focus on Susan after that. I mean, no offense Susan, but the thing is - you’re no Halle Berry. No Storm in X Men, No Catwoman in Catwoman, no Cappy in Robots. But I wanted to show Susan a good time, so I thought I’d let her in on a little of the ol small world of show business thing. And maybe make a nice connection with Halle in the process. We actors know how to talk to each other, and Susan, being a librarian, found that very impressive. I sat through dinner, waiting for just the right moment to pounce, and as I crossed to the bathroom, I stopped, placed a gentle but firm hand on Halle’s shoulder and said, “Excuse me, could you tell me where the bathroom is?” Halle looks me square in the eye and says, “I think it’s back there,” pointing behind her. You should have seen the stink eye that Halle’s date gave me. Boy oh boy.

When I sat down with Susan again, she was just bubbling with questions. “What did you say to her?”, “is she pretty up close?” “where’s the check?” etcetera. I’d call the night a major success. I haven’t seen Halle since then, but I have a feeling that the time will come when I can remind her of our brief encounter someday. And at the very least, it makes for a nice little name drop at parties. “Oh yeah, Halle and I eating panasian cuisine together on a Sunday. Pretty crazy.” But seriously folks. Halle is an excellent actress and I really respect her career and integrity. I am honored to call her an acquaintance, and I hope that we get to work together someday. If her agent is reading this, I can be reached at bringbackjerometolost@gmail.com.

Oh and hey everybody - LET’S BRING BACK JEROME TO LOST! Sign and spread that petition, people - every little signature counts.

Over and out.

***JEROME***

p.s. Let me know if you have an thoughts about my signature. I’m playing with some symbols, got some asterisks at work above. Trying to find a nice simple design that really captures “me,” and says to the reader “talk to you later.” Any ideas are welcome.

*Name and location have been changed to protect the identity of John from Colorado.

**Restaurant name has been changed to protect Halle.

Auditioning for ABC's Lost

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 10:38:11 -0400

I just want to start today by thanking everyone for the support and for the inbox activity. In a few days we could be a pretty mobile operation, my friends. Hehe, let’s not get ahead of ourselves but seriously though I’m feeling the love everyone. Sorry for taking a couple days to post again, its tough making this a regular habit.

So yeah, you all voted and clearly want to hear more about my experiences auditioning for Lost. Well here goes. A wise person once said, acting is in the choices. Or something close to that, I’m not really sure about the wording. When I went in to audition, my choice was to memorize all four of my lines, and to wear glasses. I walked into that waiting room and though I’m pretty sure that lots of those guys were off book, I didn’t see a single pair of glasses. It’s hard to say what the auditors saw in me, hard to say why birds fly, why the sky is blue, why some chips have ridges and some don’t, but I’m pretty sure my glasses made a good impression. Let’s just say I got the part.

I felt pretty solid on most of my stuff, hit the dramatic pause I’d planned, stumbled a bit when I said “over there” - but get this, when I stumbled, I did the ol pensive glasses readjust, and smoothed over the bump. Helped fill out the humanity of my character, just a nice little trick my Acting the Mystery coach bestowed upon me.

Unfortunately, the tactic hasn’t been quite as effective lately. After landing Lost, I made glasses my “thing.” Sort of like a the daytime Jack Nicholson was what I envisioned. I started wearing them to every audition. Bought a few different pairs. I don’t actually need to wear glasses, I have 20/20 vision, so I get headaches occasionally, but I figure it’s worth it cause no pain no gain, right? I get asked to take them off a lot, but I consider that an icebreaker to more conversation, and a hidden window to success.

So for next time, what do you think? Horn rimmed or wire frame for the role of “crackhead #2”? All ideas are welcome. No actor is an island.

You Choose the Topic for Tomorrow

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 11:53:04 -0400

Ok, if you spend enough time at a coffee shop reading magazines, you start to get an understanding of what the people want, and what the people want is choice!

So, for tomorrow’s post, I’ll let you pick from three semi-scandalous topics for me to cover. To vote, shoot me an email at bringbackjerometolost@gmail.com with the topic as the subject line.

Your topics to choose from are:

A) The most famous celebrity I’ve ever gone on a date with

B) What it was like auditioning for Lost

C) The worst role I’ve ever been offered

Start sending me your votes now!

Shot from my seat in Starbucks. (sometimes I go to Urth and...

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 11:35:00 -0400

Shot from my seat in Starbucks. (sometimes I go to Urth and sometimes its just the closest starbucks, and today it was a decision that came down to the price of gas vs the price of hipness, which makes me realize that without the sweet deliciousness inside this cup, L.A. would crash, or we’d all be stuck guzzling energy drinks like Lilo or an Olsen twin, and no one should have to do that to themselves. BTW, longest elipsis thought bubble rant ever.)

Sign my petition to the writers of the ABC show Lost

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 11:23:17 -0400

It’s only been up for 12 or so hours and I’ve gotten 10 signatures, that’s ok, right? I mean, I’m not exactly reaching out to my network that consists of the same people I’m hoping to get new work out of. It would look pretty bad if I was like, “I’d love the part of Joey’s other obsessive compulsive roommate in the new Matt LeBlanc sitcom, AND could you sign this petition to get me back on Lost?”

See my perdicament? My plan to spread this thing pretty much consists of sitting in this Starbucks with my laptop open, turned out, hoping someone says, “what’s that?” or even offers a two-second glance, something for me to jump on and say, “oh, yeah, this thing? I’m an actor….” (shudder)

Ok, 10 is not ok. I could really use your help. By ‘your help’, yeah, I mean spam your friends with this. But they’re your friends, so they’ll get over it. Or they were never really friends in the first place. So… use my petition to prove your friends are really loyal, trustworthy, and genuinely good human beings.

Sign it and spread it, please?